June 23, 2005
Her idea was for a top ten reasons my mentoree's hate me. So here we go.
10. I don't have the common courtesy to advise them I will be in town. I just show up, smile and say, "I'm here!"
9. I force them to alter their lunch schedules so I don't have to eat in the corporate cafeteria alone.
8. I sneak up and scare them when they are working. (This is accidental, I do not actually try to scare anyone, scar (mentally) yes, scare no!)
7. My presence makes them feel like they were sent to the princepal's office.
6. Since I know no one else here, they field the brunt of my jokes. (Which includes disabling their mouse and hooking up a cordless one that I control. More on this later)
5. They feel the need to be in the office by 7 AM and stay to 6 pm just to make sure they can get all their work done, AND talk with me.
4. They don't get a corporate paid trip to a luxury hotel for three nights with meals included.
3. They are afraid that if I get displeased, I will toss them out of a window 22 stories up. Which is completely untrue... Because then I would have to start the mentoring process over with a new person!
2. I wont shut up about re-enacting and blogging.
and the number one reasons my Mentoree's hate me:
1. I use my briefcase as a cudgel to knock them out of the way so I can use their desks/phones/terminals to check my e-mail, figure out the inventory, contact my office and blog while on lunch or after I'm off the clock.
There you have it folks. Just a little mid-trip update.
BTW I have some blog fodder stories that are either going to make you laugh or ask why the hell you associate with me.
Posted by: Contagion at
04:48 PM
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Post contains 376 words, total size 2 kb.
Posted by: vw bug at June 23, 2005 08:24 PM (JS05t)
Posted by: Graumagus at June 23, 2005 08:38 PM (IDII/)
Posted by: Harvey at June 24, 2005 02:09 AM (ubhj8)
Ah yes...the life of a corporate consultant. Nothing is better. A couple of months ago I began something similar for American call centers.
I need to make a note of the cordless mouse concept...people are wondering why I'm giggling at my laptop right now.
Posted by: Kiana at June 25, 2005 09:56 AM (QqUwZ)
But at least they know you have a sense of humor. Even though your only goal is to make sure YOU laugh at whatever expense :-)
Posted by: Sissy at June 25, 2005 09:05 PM (uXS+O)
Posted by: Bou at June 25, 2005 09:09 PM (J9A1R)
Posted by: vw bug at June 27, 2005 11:00 AM (/8HxP)
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