This is for the guys. Over at AskMen.Com they have Top 10: Chicks Kissing Scenes. Now these are mainstream movies, not from the adult industry, so these are actual legit actresses.

I just thought it was time for me to re-introduce some "art" to my blog.

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Part of me thinks this is cool, but the other part thinks that only an ultra fan boy or a real geek would want this.

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I don't know why this kid was kicking the wall, I really don't care. All I know is that at the end of the video I couldn't help but laugh at him.

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Don't like to mow your lawn, but you don't want to hire someone else to do it? How about getting a Lawnmower Robot?

With the introduction of the LawnBott LB3500, KA Home Robotics has raised the bar in home robotics for lawn care. The LB3500 is the worldÂ’s first Bluetooth compatible home robotic device. The owner can program and directly control the LB3500 through any Bluetooth compatible cell phone or PDA type device!

They aren't available yet, but it says they are coming soon. I'm willing to bet these things will cost a small fortune. Luckily, I have a teenager to do my mowing.

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Anyone that is a fan of the Movie Labyrinth is familiar with Contact Juggling.

Here is a guy in a park, presumably Japan, that makes it look really easy. If you like this kind of performance art, you'll love what this kid does with a crystal ball.

Posted by: Contagion at 08:20 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Supreme Court Says Americans have right to guns.

I received a text message in a meeting with this news. I jumped out of my seat and cheered. Then I got to explain to the anti-gun liberals at work why they were wrong!

Drinks on me tonight for anyone that can make it to my house!

UPDATE: Shadoglare sent me a link to the NY Times article (Justices Rule for Individual Gun Rights and Gun Control Supporters Show Outrage)on the story. They of course put a very anti-gun spin on the whole thing, especially the second article.

If there was any doubt that other bans would be in peril, the National Rifle Association quickly put those questions to rest when it announced shortly after the ruling that it would file a flurry of lawsuits challenging restrictions in San Francisco, Chicago and several Chicago suburbs. The law in Washington, which spelled out rules for the storage of weapons and made it extremely difficult for most people in the district to legally possess a handgun, was among the strictest in the nation.

...

In Chicago, Mayor Richard M. Daley, a staunch supporter of gun control, called the decision “frightening” and said he was bracing for a fight with the gun lobby, which has long criticized the city’s ban on the sale and registration of handguns for everyone but police officers and a handful of others. Enacted in 1982, the law was created in response to the murders of two police officers and the assassination attempt on former president Ronald Reagan.

“Does this lead to everyone having a gun in our society?” he said at a news conference. “If they think that’s the answer, then they’re greatly mistaken. Then, why don’t we do away with the court system and go back to the Old West? You have a gun and I have a gun and we’ll settle in the streets.

“They’re changing the rules,” Mr. Daley said of the Supreme Court. “Why should we as a city not be able to protect ourselves from those who want guns in our society?”

Senator Dianne Feinstein, a former mayor of San Francisco, which also restricts the owning of guns, reacted strongly to the ruling, saying she was “viscerally affected” by it and worried for the nation’s safety.

“I speak as somebody who has watched this nation with its huge homicide rate, when countries that have sane restrictions on weapons do not have that homicide rate,” she said. “And I happen to believe that this is now going to open the door to litigation against every gun safety law that states have passed — assault weapons bans, trigger locks, and all the rest of it.”

Of course they went straight to Daley. That man would try to take away any rights a person has if it was a threat to his power in Illinois. And, no we don't want to get rid of law and order. We, the law abiding citizens of the US, want the rights that are afforded to us in the Constitution. Just because I own a handgun, rifle or shotgun that does NOT mean I am going to commit a crime. In fact if you look at the statistics, most firearm violence is perpetrated by people that own them ILLEGALLY!

We don't want the wild west, we want law and order. We just want to have our own firearms and to be able to protect ourselves, go hunting, sport shooting or just collect them. But these individuals don't see it that way. They believe anyone that wants a firearm is going to commit a crime or become a vigilante.

I'm not touching the part about McCain and Obama, since they both equally annoy me and I'm not voting for either one.

UPDATE AGAIN: I thought New York was Bad, The Chicago Sun Times article, Court gun ruling has Chicago thinking it's next is even worse. The second half reads like an editorial.

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This eveningÂ’s beer is another left over from the Beer Tasting. Tonight IÂ’ll be reviewing Badger Porter by the Sand Creek Brewing Company in Black River Falls, WI. The funny thing about this beer is that three people brought a six-pack of it. Wes, Graumagus and I each brought a six-pack of Badger Porter to the tasting.

It comes in the standard 12 oz brown bottle. There is a brown label on it that has the picture of a badger’s head right in the middle of it. Across the top of the label it says “Badger Porter” and at the bottom it has the information about the brewing company.

When poured into a glass it has a nice deep brown color with a ruby highlight to it. There was a half inch tan head that faded slowly to a film on top. There was very minimal lacing on the side of the glass.

The smell is a mix of roasted malts with a touch of nuts. There is a soft undertone of cocoa that is also noticeable. It has a taste of coffee malts with a touch of bittersweet dark chocolate. There isnÂ’t much else to it. I really could not make out any hop flavors in it.

It is a medium bodied beer with good carbonation. There is a silkiness that coats the mouth and tongue and makes it pleasurable to drink.

At the beer tasting it wasnÂ’t rated bad, but we all thought it was really bitter for a porter. In all actuality when drank alone it is just fine. ItÂ’s not too bitter, and itÂ’s much more palatable. At the Beer Tasting I gave it a 5. Tonight on a clean pallet IÂ’m giving it a 6.5

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I know I've said this before, but this time I'm really pissed off. It has nothing to do with the government or politics. It has to do with a group of people that live here in the city.

I was browsing the local rag newspaper when I saw the headline Neighbors worry about home intended for homeless veterans. It took me a second, I had to re-read the headline. I was sure that I misread that. No, it said exactly what I thought it did. Then I thought to myself, "Maybe, just maybe the Rockford Register Star is putting a spin on the headline to attract attention". So I read the story. Nope, the headline was pretty farooking accurate.

CarpenterÂ’s Place closed Friday on the three-bedroom ranch home at 3426 Ridge Ave. It moved in furniture over the weekend, and on Tuesday, a group of employees and volunteers stood in a circle in the living room, held hands and prayed for the people who will live in the house and the neighbors.

The only thing missing now is the tenants, and thatÂ’s what has neighbors worried.

Located in a quiet northwest neighborhood, the home will be used to house three military veterans who are transitioning back into society.

“It’s got the neighbors in an uproar,” next-door neighbor Betty Percey said Tuesday afternoon. “They’ve been exposed to war. What happens if one night one of them goes off the deep end? All of this looks fine and good now, but is it going to last?”

I know, maybe it was just one of the neighbors, there can't be more right? Wrong

Betty, and her husband, Curlee Percey, sat in their driveway Tuesday afternoon and watched a contingent of CarpenterÂ’s Place workers tour the home. They were joined in their driveway by neighbor Oneal Tennial.

“You see people who have had flashbacks or relapses,” Tenniel said. “A lot of people look normal, but they’re not.”

Barbara Garrison-Harris, also a next-door neighbor to the veteransÂ’ home, expressed her reservations as well.

“First of all, if they don’t have a problem why do they have to be put in a house and watched over? And why didn’t they talk to us before they (bought) the house? And what about the senior citizens here who helped build this neighborhood? Don’t they have any regard for them?”

Holy cow these people actually think that they should be consulted before the sale of a house? Remind me of this the next time one of my neighbors moves out so I can tell them that they have to run all approved sales by me first. Since when do neighbors get a say in who buys a house or lives there? They don't get a say for rental properties either. It's kind of arrogant to think that they should.

Now I know some chuckle head is going to pipe off with "This isn't the same". The heck it isn't!

Located in a quiet northwest neighborhood, the home will be used to house three military veterans who are transitioning back into society...

...Through a special Veterans Affairs program, CarpenterÂ’s Place was able to buy the Ridge Avenue home for $53,437, or half the market price. The only requisite is that the house be used for housing homeless American veterans. Because the home will house only three nonrelated people, no special zoning from the city is required and the sale did not have to go before City Council for approval.

Carpenter's Place, the group that bought the house, is basically using it as a staging point to help homeless veterans get back on their feet. It's no different than habitat for humanity giving houses to the homeless or renting homes for the homeless to live in. The only difference is that the men in this case fought a war for our country.

These are soldiers that at one time put their lives on the line because their country asked them to. They fought and bled for this country. They watched friends and colleagues get injured or even killed. These men did something that a lot of others have never done in this country, including probably the individuals quoted above. Don't they deserve us treating them with some kindness and thanking them for their service? Shouldn't we offer them any assistance that might be needed to help them get back into society? Isn't it our duty to help take care of and look after these heroes?

As for the comment about them being exposed to war... There are more mental issues out there than Post Traumatic Stress Disorder... or what ever the catchphrase for it is now. I know a lot of people that have served and fought in wars for this country. From World War 2 all the way to the current conflict. Most of them have returned to normal life with out any noticeable difference. The one that I have met that hasn't, I couldn't tell he was having issues until he told me about it.

Now if you'll excuse me. I'm going to go cool off.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:26 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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Spontaneous beer review night has struck again! Tonight IÂ’m finishing off a bottle of Celis Grand Cru by the Michigan Brewing Company in Webberville, MI. This was one of the beers that Graumagus brought to the beer tasting.

It came in a standard 12 oz brown bottle. It has a green label with the name in white letters across the top. In the middle of the label is a wood carvingesque picture of men making beer. . There are laurels around the picture and pictures of hops in the bottom corners.

There was a beautiful honey coloring to this beer. It was clear and light passed through easily. The thin white head faded quickly to nothing more than a ring around the glass. There was no lacing what so ever.

The smell is not overly pleasant. It was a mixture of Coriander, hops, citrus and yeast. Combined they actually give off a slight liver scent to the beer. In fact it was very reminiscent of liverwurst. The taste was much like the scent. It had a mix of coriander, yeast and malts that gave it liver-like flavor. There was a little burn to the finish of the beer.

This is a light bodied beer, and it was a little heavy on the carbonation for my tastes.
This is the second Belgian-style ale IÂ’ve reviewed and IÂ’ve come to the conclusion that maybe I just do not like that style of beer. Over all I did not find this pleasurable to drink.

I know at the beer tasting it garnered a lot of similar reactions. It was the lowest scoring beer at the beer tasting with a group average of 1.5. At the beer tasting I gave it a 2. IÂ’m going to stick with my rating of a 2 out of 10.

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Okay, in an effort to help my gastro problems and just to be healthier I’ve started eating “Healthier” breakfast cereal. I’ve tried four different kinds so far and I’m about to give up on it, especially this last one. Let me give you a run down on what I’ve experienced so far.

A) Kashi Go Lean Crunch: Interesting flavor, I wouldnÂ’t say itÂ’s bad, but IÂ’m not sure IÂ’d say I like it either. There is a very interesting texture to it. It gave me gas.

2) Kashi Go Lean Crunch with Honey Almond Flax: Again interesting flavor, I think this one tasted better than the regular, IÂ’m still not sure I like it. The texture was interesting. It gave me gas.

D) Life: Okay, this one may not be considered a “Healthy” cereal, but it had the green sensible solution box on it and comparing it to “healthy” cereals it matched up pretty good. I liked the flavor, I liked the texture. My family liked the break from the gas.

4) Grape Nuts: How this cereal stays on the market is beyond me. Seriously the smell kind of reminds me of silage. The flavor reminds me of the remnants of the mash they use to make beer. It doesnÂ’t taste like beer, it tastes like fermented grains that were boiled, dried and served with milk. I kid you not I think IÂ’d rather eat the box. I put four packets of sweetener into my cereal container just to choke it down this morning. Now IÂ’m sitting here feeling like there is a lump of soggy cardboard in my stomach. Except the soggy cardboard would probably have tasted better. To make matters worse not only did it give me gas, but it gave me unspeakably foul gas. I emptied a conference room with a tiny squeeker. Fortunately the cheek flapping, sphincter hurting colon bomb I let loose in the bathroom. When I regained consciousness and picked myself off of the floor, I helped the other victims evacuate the restroom.

I just want to know, is there a decent healthy cereal that A) Tastes good and most importantly 2) DoesnÂ’t give me gas.

Posted by: Contagion at 05:58 AM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
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1 Grape nuts does not smell like silage. At least it never did to me, and I have literally judged silage in competition before. I don't mind the flavor of it, but it does have a slight resemblance to mash. The best way to eat Grape Nuts is with some fruit in the bowl-usually enough to have a piece of fruit with each spoonful of micro-mountain oysters. When I eat them, it is with a banana, but you could use any fruit, strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, kiwi maybe. Possibly even melon. The reason for the gas is most cereals like those you have mentioned are LOOOAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDD with fiber, and when you mix that much fiber with someone as full of s*^t as you, BAM!!!!, mustard gas. Try beano. A bottle with each bowl.*** ***This advice is based on absolutely no medical training. I am not responsible for huge explosions in the sub-cockles of you system.***

Posted by: Petey at June 24, 2008 07:54 AM (tmnSV)

2 Even Wil likes this one, General Mills Oatmeal Crisp. If you must eat cereal this one is healthy & tastes good at the same time.

Posted by: red at June 24, 2008 08:16 AM (Xw6pC)

3 Petey: I will caveat my identifying the smell of grapenuts as silage. I'm a city boy, even though I spent a summer working on a farm as a kid, I rarely had an exposure to silage. I do smell it about once or twice a year when I visit a farm. But to me, the scent is very reminiscent of what my memory of silage smells like. As for eating it with fruit. Well I don't like fruit and I'm sorry there is nothing you can add to Grape Nuts to make it taste edible. You may be diluting the taste, but it's still going to be bad. Red: Once I finish my box of silage I'll have to see if I can find that one and try it.

Posted by: Contagion at June 24, 2008 08:21 AM (Jfxjt)

4 Try Total. And good luck with the gas....

Posted by: Richmond at June 24, 2008 08:30 AM (r5dRC)

5 Honey Bunches of Oats are great. Also, Quaker Toasted Oatmeal is pretty yummy AND good for you.

Posted by: Omnibus Driver at June 24, 2008 10:03 AM (WOXRM)

6 Raisin Bran or Mini Wheats, Brown Sugar flavor. Both Yummy! Adding raisins, fruit or dried fruit to any flake cereal would greatly improve the flavor.

Posted by: Quality Weenie at June 24, 2008 10:41 AM (uHRYR)

7 I'm also a fun of the honey bunches...

Posted by: Shadoglare at June 24, 2008 12:23 PM (Volhe)

8 Omnibus Driver: I'll have to add those tot he suggestion list to try. QW: Isn't the mini wheats with brown sugar packed full of sugar?

Posted by: Contagion at June 24, 2008 12:23 PM (Jfxjt)

9 Actually it's Cinnamon streusel in the mini wheats. 180 calories / 10 from fat 1g total fat 0 cholesterol/sodium 44g carbs (5 fiber/12 sugar/27 other) per serving, 24 biscuits equals 1 serving

Posted by: Quality Weenie at June 24, 2008 04:31 PM (BksWB)

10 I eat AllBran and add either raisins or dried cranberries. raisins give me gas.

Posted by: vw bug at June 25, 2008 05:01 AM (FPOeI)

11 What is this fixation people have on eating cereal for breakfast... I hate cereal (guess that's why I don't "get it"). How about eating leftovers from a healthy dinner the night before? I often do that instead of breakfast food. At least when I remember to eat in the morning - most times I forget... LOL.

Posted by: Teresa at June 25, 2008 11:45 AM (mMa3+)

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"I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death."
~George Carlin

Comedian George Carlin Dies at Age 71.

George was one of my favorite comedians and actors. Even Clone loves George Carlin, however he knows him as the conductor/narrator on Thomas the Tank Engine. I always loved his routines and really could listen to him for hours. Anyone that has ever received an e-mail from me has seen my tag line:

"I'll bet there aren't too many people hooked on crack who can play the bagpipes."

That was stolen directly from one of Carlin's books.

George, thanks for the laughs and I hope you rest well. Hopefully you never converted to Frisbeetarianism, I'd hate you to spend the rest of eternity on the roof.

Update: I found this.

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Today Ktreva decided that I need to get some new clothes. Apparently she decided that a major update to by wardrobe was past due. The last time I went clothes shopping for non-work related clothes was the summer of 2003 before Clone was born. These do not count novelty T-shirts I buy. I'm in my mid-thirties and no longer feel the need to actually dress "trendy". As long as the clothes aren't ragged and fit, I'm happy to wear them.

Since most of my "going out in public" clothes are hardly worn, they are all in good condition. Usually I spend the weekends wearing shirts that really were never meant for me to wear out in public for a social gathering. You know, they look fine, but the message on them is a little "disturbing". IE My zombie, blogger, fire arm t-shirts, etc. Usually on the weekends I wear those or if I'm going out with friends I'll still wear them as Ktreva is not coming with to be embarrassed by me.

Today, Ktreva had enough and decided it was make over time. I was going to get some new clothes that she won't be embarrassed to be seen in public with me wearing them. Ones that are fit for proper social occasions. Not only is she making me get new cloths, she's making me grow my facial hair back. And when I mean making, I really, truly mean making. She vowed never to do that thing she does that I like very much that she doesn't do very often, but she's really good at it until I grow my facial hair back. She also said if I shave it off again with out her permission she'll stop all together. It's amazing what the power of blackmail is.

We spent our entire lunch looking for new clothes for me. I had to try items on pick and choose things... it was hell. There was some negotiation, and I earned a couple of concessions. There was this nice embroidered Jack Daniels shirt I found that I wanted. She wasn't going to let me get it because she didn't want to be seen in public with me wearing it. But I agreed to get this orange plaid shirt she found if I can get the Jack Daniel's shirt. She agreed and I got the shirt I wanted!

I also found a t-shirt that said "Case Worker" on it and it had a picture of a case of beer. She found a green safari shirt she thinks would look good on me. We negotiated and I got the t-shirt and the safari shirt. All in all I picked up a week and a half's worth of new shirts. 7 of them "going in public" shirts. Even though I got some shirts I don't like that much, it's more important that I picked up a couple that I liked a lot. As for the orange shirt and the safari shirt... yea, between you and me, they're never leaving the closet.

Posted by: Contagion at 04:49 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Okay, my office doesn't break out nerf guns and start shooting each other, but there is a definite division between the departments. Plus my peers and upper management in my office would never, ever be this much fun.

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Okay, I know I haven't posted in a couple of days. Sorry, about that. Let me fill you in on what happened.

First Friday at work we had a big meeting about the Hot Dog issue. First the other department had to be included, then they decided not to. Well long and short management said that they had to I got the the pleasure of cooking the hot dogs. We went over logistics and who is going to do what and when. It really was a colossal waist of time.

After work I went out with what was to be some of my peers for drinks and just kind of a"get to know you" think outside of work. It ended up just being me and one of my other co-workers as the rest all backed out. Fortunately Ktreva trusts me because me going out to a bar with another woman could seriously look like a date. However, since I'm completely devoted to Ktreva and not about to screw up the best thing in my life, I was just having drinks with a peer and talking shop. It was fun. My Peer had been going through a rough patch in her life and really needed to go out and get drunk. Fortunately for her, while many of you know me as Contagion... my secret identity... I'm also the heroic (Insert music) Drinkin' Buddy! (insert more music).

Yea, I learned two things about my peer that night. First is that she really has no self-esteem and she gets drunk on 6 drinks... in a 6 hour time span. At least she's not a crier.

Then today I had to go to work and cook the farooking Hot Dogs. I was borrowing a grill from Wes and I had meant to pick it up earlier this week. Unfortunately I had forgotten to, so at 7:30 AM I went to his house and picked it up on my way to work. I found out this evening when I dropped it off that while I thought I was being quiet, apparently I woke up his wife and a neighbor. OOPS!

Work was kind of a joke. I spent 7 hours there not actually working but being more of a morale coach. Of course I was wearing my "The floggings will continue until morale improves" t-shirt from the Bristol Ren-Faire. But I'm not going to go into that, lets just jump to the nitty gritty of it okay, the hot dogs. We had taken a roll call of how many people said they were going to work on Saturday and that wanted a hot dog. It came out to 40, I ended up getting enough food for 45 (feeding the 5 supervisors that were going to be there as well). At two hot dogs a piece, I bought a bulk amount of 90. The other department showed up with 3 packages of 80 hot dogs. So we had a total of 330 hot dogs.

Of course none of them helped me, and to be honest I told them they didn't need to help me cook, but I could use help in shuttling the finished hot dogs into the office. Well, I guess they took that as I didn't want their help at all. So I was cooking from 10:00AM until 1:00PM. It was a long hot day for me.

When all is said and done, at 3:00PM when the office closed, all of the other management but one of my peers from my department stuck around to help me clean up. There was about 100 hot dogs left over. I tried giving them away, I told the employees they could take some home. But no, nobody wanted them. I ended up taking home the left over hot dogs and buns. When I dropped the grill off to Wes, I showed him my gratitude for letting me use his grill by giving him 24 hot dogs and buns. It's not much, but hey I figured he could use them and they'd probably end up getting tossed.

All in all the day sucked. I hate my upper management and the peers from the other department, I'm annoyed at my peers from my department.

The only bright side is that I didn't get one complaint. Everyone like the hot dogs. For which I'm sure upper management will take credit for the idea.

Posted by: Contagion at 03:39 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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I canÂ’t believe the gall of the upper management in my office. Last month they advised us that on June 21 and 28, both Saturdays, we are going to be open to work It is expected that all management at my level be there 7:00AM to 3:00PM both days to support the staff that is there. Fine, not really a whole lot I can do on a Saturday, but okay. The problem is that one of my peers is getting married at 2:00PM on the 21st. This has been planned months prior to them deciding this was going to be a mandatory workday. Many of my peers, including myself, were planning on attending the wedding. Since IÂ’m going to be on vacation on the 28th, I volunteered to cover the entire afternoon shift and not go to the wedding.

It was decided that we were going to provide a meal for those that came in to work 8 hours as a token of our appreciation for working during the summer months. They discussed everything from salad bars, box lunches, potato bars, pizza, pasta, catered food and sandwiches. The problem is that this is all very pricey stuff and requires manpower to over see. Since it was originally going to be myself after 12:00PM, I wanted something easy. So I volunteered to grill Hot Dogs for those that committed to working 8 hours. Our department has about 80 people in it, there are a lot of people on vacation, and I figured weÂ’d get maybe 15 that were going to work the full 8 hours. I could handle this easily enough. I grill the hot dogs outside, between noon and 1 they come out get two hot dogs a bag of chips and a bottle of water on their lunch. Easy as pie.

Then the micromanagement began. “We should extend this to anyone that works over 6 hours. Fine. That’s still only maybe 30 people. Then it was anyone that works 5 or more hours. Okay, now we are about 40 people. Still, that’s not too bad, I had to make some changes in my plans to make sure that I could cover everything… remember I was doing this alone.

Finally the mentally obtuse upper management in my office got together and decided that they were going to extend this to the other department in the office. The one that has about 250 people in it. With out consulting me they sent out to the management of the other department notice that ANY of their people working on Saturday will be given Hot Dogs and that I would be doing the cooking and shopping for it. Again, IÂ’m doing this by myself.

Now the kicker is that my peers in that department would pitch a fit if they planned something like this and my department was invited by management to participate. Case in point, last JanuaryÂ’s pancake breakfast. They had one and we had to hold our own on a different day as to not interfere with theirs. They really are a group of manky gobshite gits.

Well the manky gobshite gits got upset with me because I said “NO!” That’s right, I said I was not going to do the cooking and overseeing of a food distribution of about 300 people estimated to be here by myself. I said that if they want to come in and bring their own damn grill and do their own damn cooking, they are more than welcome too. If the people that have are coming in to help with claims processing and are putting in over 5 hours, I’d feed them too. But I am, nay, I WILL not solo handle this entire thing. Now of course because I stupidly pointed out to management I was doing this alone, they are making some of the peers in my department come in and stay the afternoon, despite my saying they didn’t need to. But my peers from the other department are refusing to, so they today decided they were not going to participate. Happy me.

Anyways I went shopping based on 40 people, and then one person added 5 more. Fortunately it worked out just right that IÂ’ll have enough for exactly 45 people, no extras.

And when upper management returns to the office Friday, IÂ’m giving them an earful. What they did was rude, disrespectful and just down right idiotic. I volunteered to do this for a specific group of people, but they just kept adding on more. It will be a long time before they see me try to do anything nice to help out anyone in that office again. I seem to get burned every time.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:08 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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1 heh- leave it up to management to suck the fun outta anything! They're a bunch of Richard Cranium's.

Posted by: Rave at June 19, 2008 10:28 PM (n62+a)

2 Petey, I pretty much did... only not as nicely. I think my "Get another farkin' cook" in a meeting sent ripples. Roses. You want a brat or your are a brat? Rave: Upper management in my office could take the fun out of sex.

Posted by: Contagion at June 20, 2008 06:27 AM (Q5WxB)

3 You know, I actually kind of appreciate this periodic reminders of why I got the hell out of there

Posted by: Shadoglare at June 20, 2008 09:45 AM (Volhe)

4 Good Lord! This would be why I seldom volunteer to do anything. Once you volunteer - the idiots think it's a free for all.

Posted by: Teresa at June 20, 2008 09:59 AM (mMa3+)

5 Shadoglare: Yea, but you never had to deal with this level of crap. Teresa: I rarely volunteer too, I did this time to help out my peers.

Posted by: Contagion at June 20, 2008 10:45 AM (Q5WxB)

6 Shut the hell up and bring me my farkin hot dog.

Posted by: Bruce at June 20, 2008 05:38 PM (G9jO6)

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Lets get this party started! ItÂ’s been a rough day and IÂ’ve been daydreaming about this review since 9:00 AM. I started work at 8:45 AM. Yea, itÂ’s that kind of day. Tonight IÂ’ll be reviewing Pioneer Black River Red by the Sand Creek Brewery in Black River Falls Wisconsin. This beer was brought to the beer tasting by Ktreva.

It comes in a standard 12 oz brown bottle. There is a light brown label with the word “Pioneer” most boldly in yell across it. A small black circle with a picture of a guy holding a hoe(?) has the words “Black River” at the top of the circle. A banner goes across the bottom of the circle with the word “Red” in red letters on it.

When poured into a glass it has a nice copperish orange color to it. There is a little bit of cloudiness to it. Light passes through easily enough but images are rather fuzzy. It had a nice off-white head about a half-inch thick that slowly faded into a thin layer on top. There was no real lacing to speak of.

There is a nice roasted malt smell to it. You can also detect a hint of a biscuity smell along with some spicy hops. The taste is a combination of caramel malts and a hint of spicy hops. The flavor is very mild and unobtrusive. What aftertaste there is fades quickly and doesnÂ’t last long.

It is a medium bodied beer. It is a little heavier on the carbonation that I prefer, but itÂ’s not bad.

At the beer tasting this one scored decently, about average. Some people really liked it, others said it was drinkable; I thought it was better than your standard. The flavor on it is very mild, but again this goes as yet another example of why not to do a beer review at a beer tasting. Everyone, including myself, thought it had a very week, almost no flavor to it. Today I can taste it much better. At the beer tasting I gave it a 4. Honestly itÂ’s more like a 5 out of 10.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:39 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Every year in July our company has it's annual reviews of all the hourly employees. We give them their reviews and then we give them a merit increase based on how good/bad they did. It sounds like a simple task, and it really should be. Except that the upper management in my office could make flicking a light switch into a ten part process that requires paperwork and approvals from three different people.

This year, because they live to micromanage every aspect of the office. Including giving out the reviews and raises. This year their eternal brilliance decided that those of us that have direct reports have to turn in a spreadsheet of all of our employees, their performance level, current salary, raise percentage, the dollar amount of that percentage and the new salary. They want this so they can approve the raises we give, even though corporately we are locked into how big or small of a raise we could give. Sounds easy enough, except there's one thing. This was due today.

We were only able to get the data for their production and quality since the 11th of June for the review period. To make matters worse, the information to do the full review can't be done for another week. That's right, they want us to figure out what kind of salary they do prior to being able to do a complete and total review of the individual.

When I questioned this decision I was told, "You pretty much already know how your people are going to do. Just go with that."

Anyone that knows me knows that I don't just make guesses or snap decisions when it comes to things that are going to have a direct impact on other people. Especially when it comes to the fairness of salary increases. I want data. I want facts. I want to make sure each person is getting what the have earned. That means I HAVE to do a full review prior to figuring out their raise.

Let me give you an example. Overtime. I take the amount of overtime a person works into consideration. We have so many "required" hours a year. Plus there is a lot of voluntary hours. One of the things I touch in on the review is the number of OT hours that my people work. If they aren't doing at least the minimum required then I start docking part of the raise the lesser they work OT. However, I also adding to it if they work a lot of OT and are productive. If they work a lot of OT and aren't productive, then I also start docking.

Last year I was sure that I knew that four of my people's OT figures were. I had two that always worked OT and two that never worked OT... or so I thought. While writing their review I discovered that Employee A, whom I thought wasn't working OT, actually put in twice the minimum required. They just never spoke about it and were very quite. Employee B, whom I thought was putting in a lot of OT actually was doing less then the minimum, they were just very vocal when they did OT and made a show of it. Employee C, whom I knew did a lot of OT was so unproductive on OT that I ended up banning her from working it for three months. Employee D, which never worked OT, actually never worked OT and was always trying to weasel out of it.

Basically out of the four I thought I was sure on, I only got one right. So what I "knew" wasn't exactly correct. You get my point, if I had done the raises prior to the review two people would have received raises more then they earned, and a third would have received one less than what they earned.

Well since they want me to do it their way, I just decided to save myself time and I'm giving all of my people the maximum raise they could have earned based on their production and quality. Hell it's a merit increase, why should their merit have anything to do with it?

Posted by: Contagion at 05:26 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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I spent a weekend with Petey and Wil and my butt is sore! Well, I guess I should explain that. I went on a canoe trip last weekend. Petey and Wil were on the same trek. Actually Wil put the trip together. Well most of that trip is sitting on your butt. In fact the canoe I sat in had a seat that was about 4 inches wide. That was just a little too narrow for my behind to be comfortable on.

Overall it was a good trip, I had a lot of fun. Then again looking at the company I kept there is almost no way I was not going to have fun. The weather was beautiful, and the scenery was picturesque. Heck, I took over 120 pictures and 80 some of them turned out pretty darn good. Now I'm not going to post all of the pictures, but I do have some up over at the Spoon and Blade, along with a really crappy map of our route.

Now I know that some of the guys I went on the trip with read this blog, and I don't want them to take this the wrong way, but this canoe trek was more of a canoe float. I think my paddle spent more time out of the water than in it. In fact I know I made the comment at least once I thought it was getting dry rot. Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with sitting back and relaxing on the river. You can put me in a tube and give me a cooler full of beer and I'm a happy man, but sitting for hours in a canoe is just kind of boring. First off your legs and butt get sore. It's not like you can stand up, stretch and move about. So you are constantly shifting trying not to be too uncomfortable. You're also trying not to flip the canoe. Also just sitting there watching the banks go by gets a little tiresome. I know it's been years since I've done a canoe trip, but I was looking forward to the paddling.

That being sad, I really did have a wonderful time. I'm really looking forward to going next year and doing the last leg of the river. I know that next year I need to bring more whiskey with. The two bottles of Dragon's milk and the bottle of corn squeezin's I brought with were gone on the first night. Hey, don't look at me, I had a lot of help drinking it. I've also got to figure out a way to store beer in a barrel with out it leaking out or going bad. There has to be a way and I'm going to figure it out!

Posted by: Contagion at 07:35 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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My latest spawn, Petey, has tagged me with a meme, IÂ’m not sure what IÂ’ve done to him, but since itÂ’s been a while, IÂ’m going to play along.

The rules:

1. Post the rules of the game at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post, the player then tags five people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know theyÂ’ve been tagged and asking them to read the playerÂ’s blog.
4. Let the person who tagged you know when youÂ’ve posted your answer.

What were you doing five years ago?

Five years ago at this time I was in a great amount of pain that I kept hid from my family really well. I had jacked up my knee something fierce in 2000 and had refused to have the surgery they wanted done on it because I had just started a new position and couldnÂ’t afford to take the time off of work. By June of 2003 I was seeing an orthopedic specialist and taking oxycontin for the pain. I had worn away all of the cartilage in my knee and had bone grinding on bone. I ended up having knee surgery in August 2003.

What are five things on your to-do list for today?
1) Finish packing my gear for the canoe trip IÂ’m going to take with Petey and Wil. IÂ’m pretty sure they are planning on tying me to a log and leaving me in the middle of the riverÂ… after trying to have their way with me.
2)Drink Beer.
3)Do the dishes.
4)Drink moonshine.
5) Try to talk Ktreva into doing that thing I like a lot that she hardly ever does, but is really good at it. I mean I am going to be gone with a bunch of guys for three days!

What are five snacks you enjoy?
1) Beer
2) Whiskey
3) Ice Cream
4) Popcorn
5) Chips and dip.

What are five things you would do if you were a billionaire?

1) Pay off the debts of myself, my immediate family, my closets friends and a couple of random people that I think just need a break.
2) Buy a large plot of land and build my dream house on it including an area to host my own rendezvous.
3) Open my own bar. If IÂ’m already a Billionaire I donÂ’t care if I make a lot of money at it, I just want a place to hang out that I really like. HeÂ’ll I probably wouldnÂ’t even work there!
4) Help various Boy Scout and youth organizations financially. IÂ’d set up a fund so that each year various groups meeting the criteria could get new equipment, money for camps or for what ever various projects they have. NO STRINGS ATTACHED (Glares angrily at the United Way.) If we want to turn AmericaÂ’s youth around, we need to bring back the support for these organizations.
5) Try to talk Ktreva into doing that thing I like a lot that she hardly ever does, but is really good at it. You just donÂ’t understand, sheÂ’s really good at it, and she just doesnÂ’t do it that often. Maybe if I were a Billionaire sheÂ’d do it more often!

What are five of your bad habits?
1) I drinkÂ… a lot.
2) I tend to let my emotions hold up until I burst letting them out on someone (who usually deserves it). IE how many times IÂ’ve gone to sensitivity class.
3) I bite my fingernails.
4) When I meet someone new I profile them and decide if IÂ’m going to get along with them or not usually with in the first 5 minutes. My first opinion rarely changes.
5) I keep trying to talk Ktreva into doing that thing I like a lot that she hardly ever does, but is really good at it. Look, IÂ’d smash my left testicle with a hammer and still enjoy itÂ… sheÂ’s that good!

What are five places where you have lived?
1) Cherry Valley, IL
2) Macomb, IL
3) Rockford, IL.
4) YeaÂ… thatÂ’s it. IÂ’m not giving you individual address.
5)

What are five jobs youÂ’ve had? (A short list)
1) Welders Assistant.
2) Cell Phone assembly worker.
3) Law-enforcement.
4) Inventory Specialist (Management)
5) Supervisor. (No, IÂ’m not telling you where. If you donÂ’t know where I work already, thatÂ’s because we havenÂ’t met face to face.)

OkayÂ…

Five people to tag huh. LetÂ’s go with Bloodspite, Shadoglare, Richmond, Harvey, and Roses. Because I care.

Posted by: Contagion at 05:13 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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1 Oh all right - look at you giving me blog material...

Posted by: Richmond at June 12, 2008 05:17 PM (C1k+U)

2 That suddenly reminds me of that dude from Office Space: "What would you do with a million dollars?" ..."I'd do two chicks at the same time."

Posted by: Shadoglare at June 12, 2008 07:34 PM (bSYrT)

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Alright folks, it's months away but it's time to mark the calendars and start to get things ready. The next BlogCrawl is going to be Scheduled on Saturday September 20th, 2008!

The day's activities will start off with the second annual BlogCrawl shooting fest at the Buffalo Range in Ottawa, IL. This is open to anyone that wants to go shooting, even if you don't want to do the rest of the activities. If you are interested in carpooling with me, we'll make arrangements when the time gets closer.

After shooting we can all get together for a Beer Tasting. Taking in some of the lessons I learned from the last event, we'll only be tasting six beers before getting to business. The actual Beer Tasting will be RSVP. You need to let me know if you want to participate in the beer tasting and if you want to supply one of the beers. The deadline for this will be September 1st. If you want to come and socialize and just hang out, you are more then welcome and you don't need to RSVP.

After the Beer Tasting we will have an open party. In stead of going to a bar, we'll be building a fire and drinking beer here. I have a computer and wireless so we can all comment together for the actual BlogCrawl.

Please go out and spread the word, I'd like to see more participants than last year.

Posted by: Contagion at 05:14 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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1 tag. your it.

Posted by: Petey at June 12, 2008 12:47 PM (tmnSV)

2 I'll see what I can do!

Posted by: Richmond at June 12, 2008 05:18 PM (C1k+U)

3 Thanks for the heads up, dude. Now I've just gotta figure out where I'll be working. If it's still in the bay area, I've got a shot at affording a flight home. If I'm back in Fresno, I'm not so lucky...

Posted by: That 1 Guy at June 15, 2008 08:52 AM (ueSyz)

4 Richmond, T1G, since you blew off the last beer tasting, I expect you to show up to this one!

Posted by: Contagion at June 19, 2008 12:55 PM (Q5WxB)

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