The basis of this is that the guy was going to teach his wife firearm safety. He told her not to touch the weapon until he got back. She obviously didn't listen to him. I know this prank was mean, cruel and possibly dangerous, but it's absolutely hilarious.

Posted by: Contagion at 11:18 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 72 words, total size 1 kb.

Here's an interesting blog. Over at Totally Looks Like they match celebrity photo's with other images they look like, be it other people or animals.

Even though I never really thought of it, but John Kerry does kind of look like Herman Munster.

Posted by: Contagion at 09:59 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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I heard on the radio it’s Earth Day today. Until that moment I really had no clue. Now I’m sure I’m supposed to do something “green” to save the planet, but we all know that’s not going to happen. So what have been my activities today?

Umm, put an additional 50 miles on my truck running around town. You know the one with the 5 inch tailpipe and gets 10 miles to the gallon. I have Boopie out cutting up a tree in the backyard. Some plastic bags accidentally blew out of the open windows on my truck during my travels. I bought a bunch of non-recycled plastic stuff. I threw away some aluminum cans. Later tonight IÂ’m going to dump some used motor oil in my backyard in hopes of killing off some plants that just donÂ’t seem to want to die.

Yea, I think that is the majority of it.

The Environment. Ignore it, and it will go away.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:39 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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This is just hilarious, because it's someone else.

Watch this first:

I don't know why she did that, or why SHE thought it was funny, but she did. Don't get me wrong, I know why I think it's funny. Now watch his response:

I know why he did this, I'm not sure it was the appropriate response, but it was damn funny.

Seriously, I wonder if these two are still together and if so, what are they going to do to each other next?

Posted by: Contagion at 10:40 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Ever want to get revenge on someone or someplace for a slight, but really don't want to hurt anyone? Well over atRockford City Hall"> Come Bomb they have a solution for you. You can place a "bomb" on Google maps.

I decided that since I'm tired of the City of Rockford's government I'd tag the Rockford City Hall.

Go place a bomb yourself.

Posted by: Contagion at 07:56 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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And I'm ready to go back to work.

Clone had the last of his Birthday party's this weekend. We had his kid's party at McDonalds. Which after dealing with 10 3-6 year olds for 2 hours I was ready to call it the end. The important point was that he had fun.

After his party I took Clone to his first Football Game. Well okay, he's seen his brother play flag football and middle school football, but this was semi-professional football. The Rock River Raptors. I even had his name and birthday announced over the intercom and on the jumbotron. He loved the whole thing. He was pretty good up until the start of the fourth quarter. Then he started getting tired and wanted to go home. He had a lot of fun, and keeps asking me to take him again. And I will sometime... just probably not until next year.

After the game Bruce and I hooked up with Graumagus at Carlisle's for a couple of rounds of the best damned Scottish Ale on tap. This is where Graumagus tricked me into helping him move the next day. Apparently not only did he want me to give him the extra washer and dryer that I had, but he wanted me to haul it and help move it for him too. What an ingrate!

That was all on Saturday. Sunday I wake up at noon... after not getting home until 3:30AM. Grau was supposed to call and say he was coming over. I had just gotten downstairs when there's a knock on the door. Guess who? I answer the door with, "I thought you were going to call first?" He responded with, "Yea, I remembered that as soon as I pulled up." Fortunately I was awake.

The dryer was in my basement, the washer was in the garage. They had been sitting in the same spot unused for almost 10 years. It appears that my garage roof must have sprung a leak in the winter as there was a bunch of nasty water in the washer. Which made it that much more heavy. By the way, it seems that back in the 60's they made washers using cast iron. That damn thing was heavy! The extra water didn't help. Plus we had to lift it into the back of my truck. Fortunately it's only about a 3.5 foot vertical lift.

After moving the washer and dryer into his new apartment's basement, we plugged it in to check it out. I guess a 40 year old electrical appliance sitting under the leaking roof of a garage doesn't last too well... it didn't seem to work. Owell, as I told him. It's his problem now! I offered to give him his money back... but since it was free he didn't think it would be worth the hassle.

As punishment for making him take a broken washer, which I did warn him it may not work, I had to help him move a refrigerator too. At this point I should mention that Wes did come over to help with all of this. I don't want to leave him out. We go to his sister's storage unit where the frige is sitting and try to get it out. Grau had to play reverse tetris in order to be able to even thing about sliding it out of the unit.

When he opened the door we discovered that a year and a half ago when it was put in the storage unit, his sister hadn't bothered to clean nor properly empty the thing. Yea... that wasn't pleasant.

After getting that to his new place and making 398,7485 gay jokes about his curtains and just him in general we made a nice impression on his new neighbors. Lets just say me rubbing my nipples in the parking lot and saying in a lisp, "If you think that frige is dirty now, just wait until we get together later." Yeah... I think his new neighbors believe a big ol' "bear" is moving in. Even after that and the broken washer Grau was kind enough to take Wes and I to Hooters for some Hot Wings and beer.

That sounds like it was all pretty easy going and fun, so why do I want to go back to work? Well, Ktreva is in Chicago on business leaving me home alone with the boys. I'm about ready to tranquilize both of them and hide them in a closet.

Now if you'll excuse me in the time it took me to write this, I think they managed to disassemble Clone's bed.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:38 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Clone has already been up, terrorized the basket, eaten more Chocolate than I probably should have let him this early in the morning and is now playing Super Mario Galaxy on the Wii why he works off his sugar rush.

Since it is Easter, I thought it would be a good time to re-introduce a couple of my favorite flash animations from years past.

First we have How To Make A Chocolate Easter Bunny.

Then after you've finished playing with that, try How To Make A Bunny Lay Easter Eggs.

Yea, I know. I have issues.

Posted by: Contagion at 08:51 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Yea, I'm sure there are many guys this clip speaks volumes to.

Yea, I know guys both now and from my childhood that if this was real, would have these girls on speed dial.

Posted by: Contagion at 10:09 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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The national weather service has issued a winter storm warning for my area. They are claiming we are going to get 6-10 inches of snow! I know a lot of people are tired of the snow, but to be honest, I like it. It makes life more fun. If we actually get that amount I'd be surprised, but if we do... YAY!

Nothing like a good Spring snow.

Posted by: Contagion at 07:40 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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When I saw this article: Weather Channel Founder Wants to Sue Al Gore, I laughed. I laughed for multiple reasons.

ohn Coleman wants to sue Al Gore for fraud. Coleman, who founded the Weather Channel in 1982, thinks taking legal action against Al Gore would be a great "vehicle to finally put some light on the fraud of global warming." Coleman rejects the notion that people must take drastic actions to reduce their energy use.

First I don't buy the global warming alarmist stuff, I don't see enough scientific data to prove anything. I'm sorry, the earth has been around more than the 100 years worth of reliable data they are basing this on. There is other evidence that the earth goes through cycles like this over large spans of time. So we are on a warm up, well in so many years we'll have a cool down. If Coleman won, I would love to see Al Gore's reaction. Which would probably be the same he has for everything else, damn robot.

Second, As much as I would love to see this happen, I think the guy would be throwing his money away. There is no way that any judge would let this go to court. Most of them wouldn't want to stand in the middle of this kind of political mess. Even if it did go to court, I highly doubt a judge would rule in favor of Coleman.

Anyways, It made me chuckle.

Posted by: Contagion at 04:48 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Then Tony Kornheiser can lick my... wait this is a PG-13 blog.

Tony, AKA Kornholer, originally brought about my ire for his horrible announcing during Monday Night Football games on ESPN. He was so bad he was even nominated for worst announcer of the year. Any of you that have watched football with me know that I really hate this man's inability to stay on topic, especially the game at hand.

Today I stroll over to Techography where Bloodspite has a post up about Tony calling bloggers toads.

It's a real, it's a real mistake, and it happens. And I don't want to single anybody out in this area, but, you know, some people sit at home and they watch TV and they watch radio and they "blog" about certain "things," and they think they know what they're talking about, and they think they have sources. They have no sources. They make stuff up. They're toads. They're little toads. Actually, they're pimples on the behind of the greater body politic in this country and in this city (everyone in the studio cackles for no reason). And because, because they have access to airwaves and three or four people read them, they think, 'Oh, I'm very important.'

Read the whole article and see how he really feels about us. Then remember the next time you see him to let him lick your... sorry, I forgot.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:15 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Maybe he's a retailer, maybe he's just a lame bandwagon jumper, either way there is a lesson to be learned. Nothing is a "Sure thing".

Free Patriots Gear.

Posted by: Contagion at 10:03 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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With Jeebus returning to Northern Illinois, miracles are happening. My long lost, and presumed retro aborted blog spawn, Virtue of The Rantings of an Indentured Servant has arose from the grave.

I've seen her around as she is a friend, re-enacting buddy and babysitter, but I thought her blogging days were done. Head on over and welcome her back to the land of the living. Maybe this time around I can keep her on life support.

Posted by: Contagion at 07:59 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 80 words, total size 1 kb.

The great an honorable T1G of Drunken Wisdom is finally coming to roost back here in the the good ol' Northern Illinois area for a period of time. He's put up an agenda of some of his places he's going to be. I'd like to see some, if not all of you join us at least one of the times. It's the time of year for family and friends... well at least friends.

Posted by: Contagion at 08:59 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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This billboard pretty much sums up how I feel about animals and hunting. Especially on Thanksgiving day.

Posted by: Contagion at 08:49 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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We all know how much I love my neighbors. For those of you that donÂ’t remember or just didnÂ’t know, I like to keep my neighbors in a healthy level of fear of me. Not that I think IÂ’m big and tough or that IÂ’d actually do something. I just want them to think IÂ’m a wack job so they leave me the fark alone.

Unfortunately many of my neighbors are new, the old ones have moved out. (I don’t know why.) So that means I have to restart operation “Leave the Burly man alone”. Last month after I bought my Russian Mosin Nagant M44 I couldn’t just bring it into the house in the box. Nope, I took it out of the box, affixed the bayonet, slung it over my shoulder and carried it in. On the walk from the truck to the house the new neighbor to the left came walking around the corner of her house and I heard an audible gasp and an exclamation of “Oh my!” The white trash across the street were all sitting in the front yard smoking stopped talking and very quietly watched me walk into the house. Shortly there after they all abandoned the front of the house and went inside.

Today I needed to clean my .75 caliber Brown Bess musket. After shooting last weekend, I really wanted to make sure it was nice and clean. I grab all of my stuff and go into the front yard. The trash across the street watch me uncase this monstrosity and start cleaning it. After a couple of minutes they have all disbursed. Some went inside and other just left. The neighbors around me kept peaking out their windows to see what I was doing. A couple of them were walking down the street actually crossed to the other side instead of walking down the sidewalk in front of my house. I was there for 30 minutes just waiting for the cops to show up.

Now, tonight, itÂ’s nice and quiet outside. Nobody hanging around making noise or just being obnoxious. Ahhh.. the freedom of having neighbors afraid of you.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:51 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 364 words, total size 2 kb.

Okay, IÂ’ve had enough people ask me about the poor demise of Graumagus and Frizzen Sparks. People itÂ’s really not my place to give you all of the details, but I will give you some. But in fine re-enactor tradition IÂ’m going to do it in song format

(Sung to the tune of General Taylor)

Graumagus has gone away.
Nothing to read John, DonÂ’t go to read.
Graumagus has gone away.
Nothing to read at Frizzen Sparks dot com.

To me way hey, hey Grau
Nothing to read John, DonÂ’t go to read.
Way, hey, hey Grau
Nothing to read at Frizzen Sparks Dot com.

Forgot to renew the domain.
Nothing to read John, donÂ’t go to read.
The address didnÂ’t remain.
Nothing to read at Frizzen Sparks Dot com.

To me way hey, hey Grau
Nothing to read John, DonÂ’t go to read.
Way, hey, hey Grau
Nothing to read at Frizzen Sparks Dot com.

Someone claimed up the domain.
Nothing to read John, DonÂ’t go to read.
Grau with anger has gone insane.
Nothing to read at Frizzen Sparks Dot com.

To me way hey, hey Grau
Nothing to read John, DonÂ’t go to read.
Way, hey, hey Grau
Nothing to read at Frizzen Sparks Dot com.

GrauÂ’s not sure what to do.
Nothing to read John, donÂ’t go to read.
GrauÂ’s mood has turned blue.
Nothing to read at Frizzen Sparks Dot Com.

To me way hey, hey Grau
Nothing to read John, DonÂ’t go to read.
Way, hey, hey Grau
Nothing to read at Frizzen Sparks Dot com.

Frizzen Sparks is dead and gone.
Nothing to read John, DonÂ’t go to read.
Frizzen Sparks is dead and gone.
Nothing to read at Frizzen Sparks dot com.

Hey writing a song about this is not that easy. For those of you that missed the point. He forgot to renew his domain and thinks someone poached it. HeÂ’s not sure what heÂ’s going to do right now. And that is all the information any of you are getting from me regarding it. If you want to know more, youÂ’ll have to talk to him.

Oh, and I didn't like the address because I didn't want to drive any more traffic that way if it was indeed stolen.

Posted by: Contagion at 03:46 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 387 words, total size 2 kb.

Here's a little educational video for all of you supervisors, managements and those aspiring to be in a position like that one day.

I would love to do something like this at my job. Unfortunately I think I would get sent back to sensitivity class yet again. What's even funnier about this video to me is that the complaining about headsets is something that I've had to deal with in my previous positions. The complaint about the headset being 5 years old and a "a little unstable" was one I received all the time. The headset I'm currently using I've had for 8 years and it's just fine.

Posted by: Contagion at 10:02 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 114 words, total size 1 kb.

Okay, maybe it's because I'm a arsehole that I find this amusing. Maybe it's because I'm a bit on the sadistic side. Actually it's both of those and the deep seeded hatred I still have of Cheerleaders left over from High School. I'm not saying they aren't cute, and I don't want Ktreva to dress up as one at least once a month, but in general cheerleaders tend to annoy the crap out of me.

Since I found it funny and it is prime high school and college football time, I felt this video was appropriate. Enjoy Cheer leading routines gone bad.

Posted by: Contagion at 09:30 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 117 words, total size 1 kb.

It seems that Graumagus of Frizzen Sparks finally got off his ass and decided to do something about his great emotional funk he's been in. He decided to get rip-roaring drunk on flavored vodka mixed with energy drinks (Which means he can now officially be called a Metrosexual at best).

Anyway, in his drunken stupor he put up a crap load worth of posts in what appears to be a relatively short about of time. Some are amusing just for the drunk factor. Go over and make his foggy headed morning for him and leave lots of comments, loudly.

And for the record I don't have three nipples, and if you want me to prove it, better bring some sunglasses. That much glowing white skin can damage your retinas.

Posted by: Contagion at 08:18 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 133 words, total size 1 kb.