When I first started this blog, I did it for three reasons. One of them being an outlet for just general crap that I have going on. Over the last 8 months, IÂ’ve found this a good place to spout off on the occasional thing that bothers me. Unfortunately, I have a post I wrote that I really want to publish, yet I canÂ’t. There is an issue that I really need to get off my chest, yet I donÂ’t dare post it. Why? Because IÂ’m afraid of three things.

A) That someone will read it and think that I’m talking about them, and I’m not. A mistake like that can damage a relationship be it friend or family. This post is about a very specific set of people. I can’t get into too much detail because it’s just not necessary and I don’t want to list specific names. However depending on how an individual reads it, they could very easily slide themselves as one of the persons of my ire. Even you casual readers that accidentally stumbled on this page while looking for the phrase, “Squirt my wife.” (I’ve been getting a crap load of hits for that)

2) The persons that I write it about will read it and know it is about them. IÂ’m not about to say anything to these individuals, itÂ’s not my place; I just want to vent. As it stands right now, IÂ’m not sure if all of them read this blog on a regular basis let alone know of its existence. I believe that one of them does and reads it at least 3-4 times a week.

D) Even if I am wrong and they donÂ’t know of this blogs existence, someone who knows them and me will say something to the individuals about what I wrote. Thus, it gets back to them. The last thing I need at this point is anymore of a strain in the relationship IÂ’m having with them.

All I want to do is really vent at this point, yet I canÂ’t. That really pisses me off because it defeats the purpose of having a blog. Where I am not a person that lets anything bother him for long periods of time, this has been eating away at my soul like a cancer for the last three weeks. There hasnÂ’t been a loss of sleep over it, just a lot of daytime pondering.

I thought that if I wrote the post, and just saved it, that would do the trick. Nope, not at all. There is no satisfaction in that. ItÂ’s like buying the car of your dreams and leaving it in the garage, never taking it out and never going for a ride. You can look at it and know itÂ’s yours, but you donÂ’t actually enjoy it. My rant is written, linked, and saved in a safe place. The thought of saving it as a draft crossed my mind, however I was afraid IÂ’d accidentally post it. GAH! (Bangs head against the desk).

This must be one of those problems that I need to hold in to make it go away on its own. Just push it down deep into the recesses of my soul that I save for other issues I have no way to cope with. Not having had to do that in over 8 years, I donÂ’t know if I can do it again.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:30 AM | Comments (14) | Add Comment
Post contains 578 words, total size 3 kb.

1 How about printing it out and tacking it up in your bathroom or something. Then it is "published" and you can get satisfaction out of that. Or break things, that helps me.

Posted by: Oddybobo at August 05, 2005 10:22 AM (6Gm0j)

2 I'd say publish it. Dealing with the aftermath might piss you off, but it's less likely to eat at your insides.

Unless it's about me, then your a dick

Posted by: Graumagus at August 05, 2005 10:49 AM (G1IXe)

3 Personally, I would say publish it if you can handle the consequences. Which vary from nothing to a lot. Or publish it on my blog. I doubt they would be reading mine.

Posted by: VW Bug at August 05, 2005 11:42 AM (ul3ax)

4 HEY, If you have a problem with me just say so. Stop talking about me behind my back.

;P

Posted by: Machelle at August 05, 2005 12:15 PM (ZAyoW)

5 Can you do private entries on your blog? I know that on my lj i can do that. Also on my lj, i don't know how this would work on yours, i can set it so that only specific people can read that entry, that way i get the advice i want and none of the aftermath.

Posted by: Sarah at August 05, 2005 12:41 PM (HcLSL)

6 Four words: hypothetical.

Posted by: That 1 Guy at August 05, 2005 08:08 PM (G0QOl)

7 Hell, if it has anything to do with what I think it may have anything to do with, let 'er rip. Chances are, folks are only getting one side of that particular story anyway. (And no, I don't think so highly of myself that it has to be about me!) ;-)
Really though, you know who your friends are, and if someone gets pissed because of the consequences of their petty bullshit, then maybe they should stop pulling their petty bullshit. (I've put all mine behind me).
We've all got to do what we've got to do, and if you need to get it out of your system, then do it dude! :-)

Posted by: Wes at August 06, 2005 04:35 PM (s+Qcl)

8 About my last post: sorry. If you need to talk, my sense of discretion is legendary. :-)

Posted by: Wes at August 06, 2005 07:06 PM (s+Qcl)

9 My Papa always said, never write anything you wouldn't want someone to read.....

Posted by: ArmyWifeToddlerMom at August 06, 2005 09:46 PM (91+9M)

10 Mass e-mail.

If I don't get one, then I know it's about me or someone I'd squeal to :-)

Posted by: Harvey at August 06, 2005 11:56 PM (ubhj8)

11 Post it with a back-date, like a month ago. It'll still be posted, but not be found easily unless someone is looking for it ;-)
(No - I have not done this on purpose, but did one in the future once, by accident!)

Posted by: Barb at August 07, 2005 05:37 PM (g9qHI)

12 Save it as a draft, then get really drunk -- you're sure to accidentally post it in your drunken stupor...

Posted by: Ogre at August 08, 2005 12:20 PM (/k+l4)

13 First of all - T1G "Four words: hypothetical"...hahahah...you are awesome!

Secondly...you can always blame it on alcohol!!

C. Block IP addresses...that's what I just did with my nosy little sister! (Sorry Harvey and Grau)

On the other hand....create another blog that only the family knows about. And if you are wanting to write about us....make plenty of room for comments! :-)

Posted by: Sissy at August 09, 2005 08:11 PM (uXS+O)

14 I say go w/ vw's guest post spot or w/ Harvey's. Mass email 2 BEfamily is my pref.

Posted by: michele at August 09, 2005 09:43 PM (iY0vk)

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