Upon returning home from work today I found the house still standing, Boopie did not blow it up, burn it down, or break anything that IÂ’m aware of yet. However, I did learn two pieces of information about my eldest.

First is that he is much like my sister in his inability to do something mischievously with out giving out tell tale signals. You know like getting into something he shouldnÂ’t have or playing with something that heÂ’s been told he shouldnÂ’t. Now, to be fair I did spend years learning how to investigate crimes. IÂ’m not saying IÂ’m an expert crime scene investigator like Gill Grissom, detective like Adrian Monk or even some actual investigative person, but I know what to look for and a lot of tricks of the trade. Unfortunately Boopie barely tries to cover his tracks.

Secondly I learned that my son is not gay. There was some speculation a couple of years ago, but after today IÂ’m pretty sure we can say he likes the girls.

How do I know this? During some thorough house cleaning I decided to throw out all of my old Playboy magazines that IÂ’ve kept hidden for years. I used to have a subscription, and wouldnÂ’t throw them away. Before anyone says anything, yes I looked at the pictures. Yet I also read the articles. They really did have some good writers. I let my subscription lapse 7 years ago and havenÂ’t read one since, so I canÂ’t say what they are like today.

I placed about 6 years worth of magazines into trash bags, and set them to be tossed with the trash on Wednesday. When I got home today one of the bags was untied and the nicely arranged magazines were no longer nicely arranged. They were in the house, so it had to be him. Sure he tried to put the bag back into the same position I left it in, but he wasnÂ’t remotely successful.

Now I thought about calling him out on this, but then I decided not to. Hell, by the time I was his age I had a nice collection of nudie mags my friendÂ’s would steal from their fatherÂ’s collection. Seriously, whatÂ’s the worst thatÂ’s going to happen?

Posted by: Contagion at 05:37 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
Post contains 382 words, total size 2 kb.

It's BoopieÂ’s first day of High School.

First I canÂ’t believe heÂ’s old enough for high school, especially since he still tends to act like heÂ’s in fifth grade. The hardest part for me isnÂ’t that I have a son thatÂ’s old enough to be in High School. No, itÂ’s the fact that I had to give him a key to the house and trust him to get to school by himself.

His school runs from 9:30 AM to 3:30 PM. Both Ktreva and I have to be to work by 9:00 at the latest, and for both of us we are supposed to be there between 7:00 AM and 7:30 AM. That means that in the morning Boopie has to get up, get dressed, get breakfast, clean up after himself and get out of the house and to school on time with out anyone there. It also means that I have to trust him to NOT blow up the house, break anything, stay out of stuff that he shouldnÂ’t be getting into and most importantly locking the house up after he leaves.

Now a lot of people will say, “He’s fourteen, it’s time you start trusting him.” I just can’t. Over the last year and a half I’ve trusted him with various things. I’ve given him responsibilities, duties, chores and opportunities to show me he’s matured into a trustworthy and responsible individual.

He blew each one in a major way.

IÂ’m not talking about a minor infraction; IÂ’m talking about spectacular, catastrophic failure. IÂ’ll give you an example. If you remember I gave Boopie some Softair guns for Christmas. He was given these with the stipulation that you treat them like real firearms. You were safety glasses, they are not to be used in the hosue, you do not point them at another person and you definitely do NOT shoot at anybody with them. If you have friends that come over to the house, you are responsible for them. You need to explain the rules and enforce them. If you horse around, IÂ’m going to take them away.

The first time he had a friend over and they wanted to go outside and shoot I had to interrupt and tell them not to point them at each other. The friend “Tall Boy” responded that they where just toys. To which I replied that I didn’t care, they shoot a projectile that can break glass. You will not point them at each other. All was fine for a couple of months until Boopie and Tall Boy brought over another friend, “EMO Kid” to shoot. I looked out the window and there was EMO Kid pointing one of the guns at Tall Boy. Again I pointed out that they were NOT to be pointing the guns at each other.

Not five minutes later I see Boppie and EMO Kid shooting at each other with the guns. In fact Booopie got shot and was bleeding. Now they are my Airsoft guns, and he wonÂ’t get them back. He asked if he could have them back a couple of weeks ago and I told him that he has not proven to be responsible enough for them.

So now I have to leave the boy home alone in a house with black powder, swords, axes, knives, real guns etcÂ… Sure the modern fire arms are secured and he canÂ’t get to the ammo, but that doesnÂ’t mean he might not try to play with the other stuff. Or start going through my personal stuff. Actually IÂ’m more worried about him not securing the house or breaking stuff than anything else. Either way, IÂ’m not comfortable about the whole arrangement.

Unfortunately I didnÂ’t have much of a choice.

Posted by: Contagion at 01:33 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
Post contains 633 words, total size 3 kb.

I’ve always joked that I was going to keep a shotgun next to the door “just in case”. Not that I plan on shooting people as they come to my door, but just in case I needed to shoot someone as they came to my door. Sometime in the last week I must have made another comment about doing that while the news was talking about possible looting in the flood area. This morning as I walked down stairs and see that Clone has placed his toy double barrel shotgun in the corner next to the door.

I had to ask him why, and he told me that it was “just in case”.

And who says kids canÂ’t learn.

Posted by: Contagion at 05:39 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 125 words, total size 1 kb.

Today is KtrevaÂ’s Birthday. As a present I bought her a Colt 1991A1 .45 in the commander model. This way sheÂ’ll leave mine alone. She seems very pleased with it. Which is a good thing.

IÂ’ve spent three hours trying to come up with words to express how much I love and appreciate her, and IÂ’m just not capable of doing it. IÂ’m just not that kind of wordsmith or poet. How can a heathen like me even begin to describe how I feel every day I wake up next to her? The way I canÂ’t help but look at her beautiful silky red hair flowing over the pillow like cascading waterfall catching the subtle ambers of a sunset. The beauty of a Celtic goddess sleeping, her head lying perfectly still as the corners of her mouth form a slight smile. When I touch her, the softness of skin is like that of rose petals on a soft summer morning. As I look at her, my heart beats a little harder and my breath quickens just knowing that I am fortunate enough to have her as my wife. I have no way of telling her these things. I canÂ’t, for she is my love and I to clumsy to profess my love of her.

But I do wish her a very Happy Birthday. And I would appreciate it if all of you could go wish her a Happy Birthday as well.

Posted by: Contagion at 10:06 AM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
Post contains 247 words, total size 1 kb.

It was almost two years ago exactly that I showed you how bad of a dad I can be. That was when I started Clone on his stirring his drink habit. ItÂ’s funny; to this day he wants ice in his drink and a straw with which to stir it. Well apparently other habits of mine heÂ’s picked up. You may have noticed that I tend to sample beers every now and then. ItÂ’s purely for the education of you, my dear readers.

In the sampling of the beers, I have a certain ritual I go through. First I pour the beer into a glass. Holding it up to the light I can judge color, clarity and head. Then I smell the beer. A couple of long, slow inhalations through the nose gives me a thorough appreciation of the aroma. Finally I take the first drink. Clone has seen me do this at least once a week for almost a year now.

A couple of months ago he started asking me if he could smell the beer. I’d take a whiff and then he’d say, “Dad, I wanna sniff it!” So I’d let him take a quick sniff just to see what he would say. Usually he says it smells good and that when he gets older he can drink it with me. So it shouldn’t surprise me that last Wednesday when I was doing my review, I had to set my beer down to grab a pencil and paper to jot down notes. When I turned around, guess what I saw? That’s right:

Fortunately for me, I had just finished downloading some pictures from an employeeÂ’s baby shower on to the computer. My camera was sitting there, ready to go so I quickly picked it up and tried to catch in the act. Unfortunately he was backing away when I snapped the picture. It was hilarious. He had his nose right to the rim of the glass with his hand fanning the scent toward his face. His eyes were closed as he inhaled deeply.

Then he smiled.

I am such a bad influence.

Posted by: Contagion at 04:43 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 364 words, total size 2 kb.

Ktreva's Birthday is coming up soon, so I thought she's been a good wife. I should get her something special. Today on lunch we went and picked out her present. But I can't let you know yet... it's a surprise.

Posted by: Contagion at 07:09 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 42 words, total size 1 kb.

This past weekend Ktreva and I took Clone to see Rockford AirFest 2007. All last week we could hear the planes arriving and practicing. We could watch them from our front porch. Clone would get so excited heÂ’d run all over the house trying to see them. It took quite a bit of convincing that by the time he could hear the jets, they were already past.

We decided that maybe he’d enjoy getting to see the planes up close. Surprise! We nailed that one on the head. In fact he was so excited with in the first 15 minutes of being there, I think he actually short-circuited his brain. He didn’t know what to point to, where he wanted to go, or anything. He couldn’t even complete a sentence. Here is, I kid you not, an actual transcript.” WOW! Dad look at.. Over there is… Momma! Do you see the.. Dad, that way I want to… Look up there it’s…. Wow! Can we go… DAD!!!!!!” Then I think he had a mental overload as the sound of the Millennium Falcon’s hyperdrive failing came from his head.

When we arrived a squadron of P-51 mustangs were doing a demonstration. At the end of it they flew the missing man formation in honor of all the men and women that have given their lives in the service of our country. Folks, I will honestly admit that not only did I feel a lump in my throat as that formation flew right over my head, but I damn well misted up.

P-51Â’s in a missing man formation

We spent some time looking for a place to watch the show. We had just finished setting up our chairs when this longhaired hippy came up and started begging for beer. I wasnÂ’t about to give him any since he was already had a beer in each hand. Then I realized thatÂ’s no hippy, itÂ’s T1GÂ…. in bad need of a haircut. (Seriously I have a picture for proof). We also bumped into Ragingmom. It was like a mini-ubercool blogmeet.

I brought my camera with to take some pictures. There were some people around me that made the comments “Why bother? All you’re going to get are dots in the sky.” I figured it’s digital. It’s not like I’m out any film. And even if I had been, I still would have tried. Normally I don’t share a lot of my more artsy photos as I take pictures mainly for me, but I really liked some of these photos. I ended up taking 620 pictures. I only wish I had brought the zoom lens with, I figured the wide angle would be better for the ground shots. Since I really didn’t end up taking any, I should have brought the zoom lens. Oh well.. next year. Also I edited the shape of some of the photo's in order to cut out dead space and reduce their size.

Part of the show had a P-51, an F-15 and an F-16 flying in formation together. It was pretty cool to watch these three generations of planes flying together. Watching them though, I could help but to think that the P-51 had to be straining to keep up the speed and that the F-16 looked like it was about to fall out of the sky because it was moving so slow. But it did make for some great viewing.

From top to bottom. P-51 Mustang, F-16 Falcon, F-15 Eagle.

The main attraction this year was the US Navy Blue Angels. This was the first time I actually was able to see them perform. It was truly amazing. At times they looked like they where actually touching each other they where so close. Here are some of my favorite pictures of the Blue Angels in action. Click to enlarge any of the photos.

There is not a larger picture of this one, it flew right over my head.

The leader flipped his plane upside while in formation at 400 MPH

A six-jet formation

Six Jet flyby.

I do have one question for my readers. The US Navy has the Blue Angels, The Air Force has the Thunderbirds (At last years show), The Army has the Golden Knights parachute team (Also at the show this year)Â… What do the Marines have? Seriously, IÂ’m sure they have something; IÂ’m just not sure what it is.

Posted by: Contagion at 07:36 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
Post contains 740 words, total size 6 kb.

1 What do Marines have? Guns & attitude :-)

Posted by: Harvey at June 04, 2007 10:45 PM (L7a63)

2 Marine pilots fly for the Blue Angels. You know Don & Roma on WLS? Their son Hunter is a Marine and flew with them.
Your pictures are so much better than mine! All I got was clouds.

Posted by: Raging Mom at June 05, 2007 04:51 AM (l+Chn)

3 Harvey, I was waiting for someone to say, "The Marines are too busy actually working to play" or something like that.

Ragingmom: Thanks for the compliment. I have a total of 620 pictures everything from the Red Baron Flight Squad to Fat Albert (The Blue Angel's C-130)I just couldn't share all of them.

Posted by: Contagion at June 05, 2007 06:07 AM (Q5WxB)

4 I am so geeked because this year at the Willow Run Airshow the Blue Angels will be back.

The last time they were at the airshow was a couple decades ago.

We can see the show (except low flying stuff) from our back porch.

Posted by: Quality Weenie at June 05, 2007 10:12 AM (R6yie)

5 While Fat Albert is a USMC plane, and there are Marines on the Blue Angels' team, it's still listed as sponsored by the Navy. I think the Silent Drill Team is about it for the USMC.

They'll still give you goosebumps, though.

Posted by: That 1 Guy at June 05, 2007 08:04 PM (Vw0J6)

6 Hell I thought the Marine's were sponsored by the Navy

Posted by: BloodSpite at June 05, 2007 09:57 PM (ZTGJT)

7 I skipped it this year since I just went last year. Saw the Angels fly right over my house a couple of times though.

Posted by: Shadoglare at June 06, 2007 09:04 PM (SKQFl)

8 Awesome pictures!!! We're going to have to make it donw for that next year!!

Posted by: Richmond at June 08, 2007 11:52 AM (e8QFP)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

WINDY!!! We have winds up to 30 mph. Now I know some of my coastal readers that are use to hurricanes will laugh at that saying itÂ’s nothing. And I appreciate that; itÂ’s how I react when I hear someone from Florida complain about it being cold at 50 degrees. What you have to remember is that we are not accustomed to winds like thisÂ… outside of tornadoes.

Clone had his preschool graduation today; yea IÂ’ll go off on that at another time. It was held at a local park that had a decent play area and a nice shelter. The wind just reaped havoc on the picnic part of the day. They tried cooking over a grill, but had a problem getting the charcoal lit, until Mr. Re-enactor boy got it started using twigs and dried grass. Then once it was started the wind blew the coals so hot that they warped the grate AND it only lasted for 20 minutes before having to add more charcoal to keep it going. Folks, I could have used this fire to smith iron. Yea, tried as I might, there was nothing I nor anyone there could come up with to help that situation. We didnÂ’t have the right materials for what we knew would work.

Bags of chips and bowls of various salads were being blown off the tables. At one point a pan half filled with hot dogs almost blew off the table, but another parent caught it. Table clothes and plates (with and without food) were flying across the park. If it wasnÂ’t for the fact that I was trying to dodge the debris, I would have found this highly entertaining.

But the funniest thing that happened was when some 4-year-old little girl decided to slide down a pole right as the wind gusted really hard. She literally flapped in the wind like a flag for a couple of seconds before her mother grabbed her. The poor thing was terrified. But not terrified to try it again and get upset when the wind didnÂ’t blow her half way to Oz.

Right now IÂ’m sitting in the house with the boys. Ktreva is in Springfield so IÂ’m playing single dadÂ… grumble. ItÂ’s 84 degrees in the house, but it sure doesnÂ’t feel like it. When the wind blows it turns the entire house into a wind tunnel. Who needs fans?

Posted by: Contagion at 05:09 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 406 words, total size 2 kb.

Some of the stuff kids pick up is just plain funny. Yesterday I was playing with Clone. It devolved into a tickle fight. I’d tickle him, he’d run away, and then try to tickle me. Repeat this cycle over and over numerous times. Finally I had to break away to go to the bathroom. When I came walking back into the living room I looked Clone in the eye and said, “Are you read to be tickled?” He jumps to his feet, places his hands on his hips, looks me in the eye and with all seriousness says:

“You wanna piece of me?”

The funniest part was that he did the tough guy head shake when he said it. You know the head shake; the one you see the goombas do in all the gangster movies when they are being tough. No, not the one the black ladies do when they are mad, think Joe Pesci in Goodfellas. Then he sticks his right hand out and does the Kung Fu “Come here” hand wave.

I thought I was going to have an asthma attack I was laughing so hard.

Then he got mad because I was laughing, apparently he was being serious. So I had to take him down a notch. Needless to say, much laughter ensued for the next 30 minutes.

Posted by: Contagion at 05:36 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 230 words, total size 1 kb.

1 OMG - I love that boy! He cracks me up.

Another 10 years and you're gonna have your hands full!!

Posted by: Tammi at May 24, 2007 12:04 PM (Bitcf)

2 ROTFL

Posted by: vw bug at May 24, 2007 01:40 PM (FPOeI)

3 Dude, I so have to get Youngerspawn over there to play with Clone.

I had this mental image of Clone doing that and of YS doing his "Your kung-fu is weak!" thing and I couldn't stop laughing.

We could start UFC for toddlers and make a mint

Posted by: Graumagus at May 25, 2007 07:09 AM (flE7E)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

We all know parents have a direct influence on how their kids act and behave. There is even a correlation between what the child likes and dislikes. This can make for some interesting behavior and comments from kids, especially if their father is a Gun loving, re-enacting, zombie infatuated, and football fanatic.

It all started a couple of months ago when I had some friends over and Clone walks into the living room and announces that “When the zombies come, you need to break out the stairs with a hammer”. I was proud, at 4 he knows basic defense versus zombies. A couple of weeks ago he comes up to me carrying his double barreled toy shotgun with the barrel pointed at the floor. All of a sudden he would snap it to his shoulder and start shooting at things and yelling “Fire in the Hole” before each shot. After the shot he would point the barrel back down to the ground. When I asked him what he’s shooting at he tells me, “I’m shooting the zombies in the head.” Gun safety and killing zombies, I was proud.

Last Sunday we were watching Shaun of the Dead, and I changed the channel to something I thought he would like more. He pitched a fit. “DAD!!!! I want to watch the zombies!!!!!” I kid you not, he threw such a temper tantrum that I almost didn’t turn it back on. Then while watching the movie he says to me, “When we go camping (IE re-enacting), we’ll have to shoot the zombies.” Huh? There are no zombies at the re-enactments. We talk for a little bit and I figure out that he thinks that some of the native’s are zombies. It has to do with their face paint. It took some convincing that Indians are not Zombies…. Well not all Indians.

Then finally on Monday we get home and he wants to go outside and play football with his brother. Okay no problem. It was when he referred to the football as the zombie head that I realized something.

Maybe I shouldnÂ’t talk so much about zombies with him in the room.

Posted by: Contagion at 04:43 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 368 words, total size 2 kb.

Yesterday we had a high between 68 and 70; (Depending on what weather source you look at) today they are calling for a high between 88 and 94 (again depending on what weather source you are using). That is a 20 degree difference overnight. It was cold enough yesterday that Ktreva turned the heat back on so she didnÂ’t have to run around in a winter parka. Now today I know the family is going to want to turn on the air conditioning.

Why canÂ’t the weather just be a tad bit more consistent!

Posted by: Contagion at 05:22 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 106 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Hey, at least 95% of our state isn't on fire....

Posted by: Graumagus at May 14, 2007 08:42 AM (FFj2f)

2 Hey it's gorgeous!! I'll take this kind of weather anyday... :-)

Posted by: Richmond at May 14, 2007 09:18 AM (e8QFP)

3 I hear you...but hey, at least it's not snowing!

Posted by: Cindy Swanson at May 14, 2007 10:59 AM (RHIA9)

4 Grau: We couldn't get so lucky.

Cindy: I wish it was snowing!

Posted by: Contagion at May 14, 2007 05:53 PM (T4WRc)

5 Yeah, you read my mind. Right after I wrote that I got thinking that certain large areas of Illinois on fire would be like an enema for this state....

Posted by: Graumagus at May 15, 2007 10:01 AM (FFj2f)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

We received a progress report for Boopie tonight. It seems that he is failing one of his classes. After talking with him we discovered it's because he's not doing his homework again. We already had pre-set consequences for this, so we banned him from video games until his grades come back up.

He's all bummed out, he just got his new Guitar Hero 2 game and was really liking it. So he started pouting and decided that he was going to hide in the closet. I didn't realize where he went to, and couldn't find him in the house. I didn't think to look in his closet, because he's 14 and I thought he would have outgrown that. Calling out from him I hear his voice coming from his room. I go in there, and can't see him. I call his name again, then I hear his voice coming from the closet.

I ask what he's doing in there (not sure I want to know). He tells me nothing, he's just hiding in there. So I say, "You're 14, you're too old for that. It's time to come out of the closet." He peeks his head through the door and looks at me with a slight smirk on his face.

At that point I realized what I said.

Yea, that's another therapy session I'm going to be paying for.

Posted by: Contagion at 07:42 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 243 words, total size 1 kb.

For Boopie's 14th birthday he wanted Guitar Hero 2. Okay, no problem. we bought it for him.

But now I regret it. Tonight I'm out back grilling (more on that later) when he comes running out and says, "Dad, do you know the song "Freebird"?" Well of course I do. So he asks me, is it any good?

Yea, kids today have no culture.

For Boopie:

Learn the classics boy!

Posted by: Contagion at 05:48 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 76 words, total size 1 kb.

1 I haven't played that game but I'm glad to hear they have some classics on there.

Posted by: Sissy at May 09, 2007 06:44 PM (y2kUf)

2 So did you tell him the truth... that it sucks?

Posted by: That 1 Guy at May 09, 2007 09:19 PM (amJz2)

3 We are loving Guitar Hero II around here - even me! :-)

Posted by: Richmond at May 11, 2007 08:12 AM (e8QFP)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

Today while at work, I received a call from my mother. She called to tell me that Clone is in a bit of trouble. Today at school they were going over fire safety. You know, stop, drop and roll, what do to in case of a fire, etc etc etc. Everything was fine until they left the building for the day. As he was walking out, he saw the fire alarm.

Yep, Clone walked right over to it and pulled it. Setting off all the warning lights and buzzers. Why did he do it? Because they pointed it out to the kids and said only pull it in case of fire. He had never noticed it before and wondered what it did. So he pulled it.

The school emptied, the teachers ran in a panic to call the fire department to advice it is a false alarm, the kids ran went outside like they were supposed to, only they had their little hands covering their ears. Apparently they thought it was great fun. The kids that is, not the teachers. I never did find out if the kids got to see the fire trucks. IÂ’m sure they would have loved that. Then again I think that only would have provoked them to pull the alarm again.

Only my kids.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:07 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
Post contains 231 words, total size 1 kb.

My sister lives a couple of house down state and wasnÂ’t able to make it up last weekend for CloneÂ’s birthday. However, she was in town this weekend so she saved her gift and gave it to him yesterday. My sister and I have one of those relationships that are normal, yet hard to understand. We love each other, but donÂ’t really understand nor get along. Thus she knows I hate it when the boys get toys that need a lot of assembly and make a lot of noise. So what does she give Clone for his birthday this year? This monstrosity:

Good lord. The assembly wasnÂ’t bad, but itÂ’s noisy as all hell. There is a motorized accelerator on it that shoots the cars through the track. Then Doctor Octopus moves around and tries to block the cars from hitting or getting past him. Then you can lower the Spiderman web launcher and shoot the cars at Doctor Octopus. Which, the cars will miss and hit the cardboard back ground with a loud thump like a drum. Needless to say, this thing is amazingly loud.

And Clone loves it.

Since I’ve assembled it yesterday he’s played with it a good 4 hours. With breaks only when I say, “ENOUGH, go do something else for a little while! Daddy needs to go chew some Advil.”

One day my sister is going to have kids, oh yes she is. When she does, payback is a beotch. Because each year the toys get louder and more complicated to assemble. Her future husband is going to learn to hate me quickly.

Posted by: Contagion at 07:46 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 274 words, total size 2 kb.

ItÂ’s been a long, long time since IÂ’ve posted anything really about the boys, with pictures. You may recall that last weekend was CloneÂ’s fourth birthday. We had a lot of fun and he scored himself some pretty cool toys. Which is both good and bad.

Ktreva and I found these foam swords that were made so that kids can actually hit each other with them and not get hurt. Hell, Clone and Boopie whack away at each other with hard plastic lightsabers. I was tired of listening to them scream and felt these would be perfect. Soft foam swords, shields and daggers for the boys to play with. We ended up buying two complete sets for Clone, that way the person heÂ’s going after can actually defend themselves.

BTW, soft foam swords still hurt when they hit Mr. Happy and the Good Time Boys.

Clone also scored two bubble guns. One is completely automatic that works like a squirt gun, you load it with bubble and it will continue to shoot until you need to add more bubble juice (?) to the tank. My parents gave him that one. Ktreva and I, based on a recommendation from another parent, bought him a battery powered one that you have to dip into a tray. That one puts forth a cloud of bubbles that will completely cover an entire room.

Yea, bubbles of doom!

He got some other toys, such as a Playmobile and a Fischer Price castle, a basketball hoop, and a new game for his V-Smile. But itÂ’s mainly the swords and bubble gun from hell that he plays with the most.

Posted by: Contagion at 07:17 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
Post contains 279 words, total size 2 kb.

1 OHG! How flippin' cute *IS* that child?!?!

And that picture with the sword? T.R.O.U.B.L.E.

So when can I come over and play with the new toys? ;-)

Posted by: Tammi at March 27, 2007 08:16 PM (wbVY2)

2 Crap. That last line didn't come out right. Crap.

Well, you know what I mean.......

Crap. of all places to make THAT mistake!

Posted by: Tammi at March 27, 2007 08:17 PM (wbVY2)

3 Aww! He is sooo cute. Happy late birthday to him. Sounds like he had a blast!

Posted by: oddybobo at March 27, 2007 09:50 PM (NyFiM)

4 I have bubbles for my boys, but they must play with it outside at all times. I discovered that bubbles and wood floors do NOT mix. ;-) I love the sword and shield... where did you get it???

Posted by: vw bug at March 28, 2007 05:24 AM (Y483N)

5 Geeze dude, like you didn't have enough swords for him to play with? ;-)

Seriously, those swords & shields rock! My two youngest play with theirs constantly. Did you get them at Toys R Us?

Posted by: Wes at March 28, 2007 08:53 PM (jsV0Y)

6 He is "adorable"!!!
Hey, you could find that cutie pie a job making bubbles for weddings

Posted by: h~ at March 29, 2007 02:43 PM (V0mR8)

7 Oh cuuuuute! That looks like so much fun! :-)

Posted by: Richmond at March 29, 2007 05:52 PM (e8QFP)

8 Like Wes, I'd also like to obtain a foam sword for recreational purposes. Where would I go to get one?

Posted by: Harvey at March 30, 2007 01:03 PM (L7a63)

9 Toys R Us, Harvey. :^)

Posted by: Wes at March 31, 2007 10:13 AM (jsV0Y)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

I love my kids. TheyÂ’re greatÂ… really. But sometimes I just want to duct tape them to a ceiling fan. Take for instance yesterday morning. WeÂ’ve been working with Clone on potty training; heÂ’s turning four on Saturday and is in pre-school. HeÂ’s been doing pretty well. He will use the bathroom to drop a deuce with out a problem. ItÂ’s when he has to drain the main vein that we run into issues.

He just does not like to use the potty. From what I can tell, itÂ’s just out of laziness. He doesnÂ’t want to quit doing what ever it is he is doing. Thus he ends up with a pair of jeans soaked in urine. ThatÂ’s pretty annoying and itÂ’s not all the time. ItÂ’s the days he does it 2-3 times in a day that it gets really annoying.

Because of his wetting issues, we’ve taken to “reminding” him to go to the bathroom. This usually consists of me saying, “Clone, go upstairs and go to the bathroom, NOW!” Clone is Mr. Independent. He does not like to be told to do anything or have anything done for him. He wants to do it all himself on his own schedule. So when we remind him to go take a piss, he gets upset. There will be crying, pouting and occasionally screaming over having to go to the bathroom.

Yesterday morning I get Clone up and am getting him ready to go. Of course itÂ’s time to do the morning emptying of oneÂ’s bladder. Clone is in the bathroom crying that he doesnÂ’t have to go while heÂ’s pulling his pajamas out of the way.

Me: DonÂ’t forget to pick up the toilet lid

Clone: I donÂ’t have to go potty (pulling off pajama bottoms)

Me: Put up the toilet lid.

Clone: I donÂ’t have to go potty (Pulling off night time pull-up)

Me: You better put that lid up.

Clone: I donÂ’t have to go potty. (Pulling up shirt)

Me: You better notÂ…

Clone: I donÂ’t have to go potty. (As he pees all over the lid to the toilet.)

Me: God DAMMIT! (Cleaning up piss)

Yea, he lived, but only through the graces of all that is good in the world.

Posted by: Contagion at 01:15 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
Post contains 390 words, total size 2 kb.

Well I went to school with Clone, I PASSED! I was able to count to ten, knew all of my colors, and didnÂ’t get any of my shapes wrong! I are smart. It was interesting to see how he interacted with the other kids. We arrived a little early and were waiting out front with the other parents. I knew something was wrong right away.

First as we were standing outside all the kids were running around playing in the mud, except Clone. As other Fathers were yelling at their kids to get on the sidewalks and behave, I was standing there holding CloneÂ’s hand. This is not like my son. Any chance to run around and play in snow or mud; Clone would be all over that in a heartbeat. If other kids are doing it, there is no stopping him. Except Saturday, no he was a perfect well-behaved angel.

When we get into the classroom the other kids are running around and yelling. The teachers are trying to get everyone settled down so they could start their program. Clone takes my hand and leads me to his spot. We sit and wait for the others. One of the other dad’s says to me, “He is the best behaved child I’ve ever seen.” I could only reply with, “Thanks, I’m just wondering what my wife did to him, because he’s not normally like this.”

Then during the “play time” he was well mannered, waited for other to take their turn before he did, didn’t take any of the toys away from the other kids or anything like that. Again, it was typically uncharacteristic of my boy. Then after class he helped other kids get their coats on. He was so charming and pleasant; I wanted to know what overcame my genetics.

After class we had some errands to run, we needed to do some shopping. Again he was the perfect child, not getting into anything. Not running around and screaming, not touching things he shouldnÂ’t. I was starting to wonder if he was sick. It was after noon by the time we finished, and I decided to that since he was being so well behaved that IÂ’d take him and Ktreva out for lunch.

We ended up going to Der Rathskeller, a local German Restaurant that has really good food. It had been a long time since IÂ’d eaten there and Ktreva never had. That was when the good behavior ended. All I have to say is that Clone, Sauerkraut, a frankfurter, mustard in a squeeze bottle and a fork is not a good combination. That's more like MY child.

Posted by: Contagion at 05:07 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 449 words, total size 2 kb.

It’s back to school for me tomorrow. Yep, that’s right I have to go to school in the morning. It’s Clone’s “Day with Dad” at his pre-school. I’m not exactly sure what it all is involved, but I do know one thing.

I sure hope I pass the tests.

To fail pre-school with a college education would be embarrassing.

Posted by: Contagion at 08:54 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 63 words, total size 1 kb.

1 For a second I thought you were talking about sensitivity training again

Posted by: Shadoglare at March 09, 2007 09:58 PM (R0BM5)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

YEAH! KtrevaÂ’s home! She can take over dealing with the screaming sick boy! Oh, and she brought me home a bottle of Jack DanielÂ’s too.

Yea, there is a reason I married here.

Posted by: Contagion at 06:37 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 35 words, total size 1 kb.